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Foreword 9 Introduction 12 Chapter 1: Incidents of Family Violence 1. My Mother's Death Should Be a Warning 18 to Others Teresa Lynn Curlin A daughter witnesses domestic abuse in her family, cul- minating in the murder of her mother, and the suicide of her father. She pleads with others in domestic violence situations to escape before it is too late. 2. I Was Molested by My Cousin 23 Erin Merryn, as told to Jessica Blatt A twenty-year-old tells how her cousin began molesting her when she was younger. Too scared and ashamed to tell her parents, she reveals her secret when she realizes her sister is also being abused. 3. The Damage of Verbal Abuse 27 Annie Kaszina Speaking from her experience in a verbally abusive mar- riage, a psychologist shares how verbal abuse in relation- ships can be emotionally damaging and yet difficult to escape. 4. Suffering through a Violent and 33 Controlling Relationship David After suffering abuse from his controlling partner-who claims that violence is part of his cultural heritage, a gay man recognizes his need to break off their destructive re- lationship. 5. Can My Abusive Wife Really Change? 37 Kevin A man recounts how his wife's verbal abuse and control- ling behavior brought their marriage to the brink of fail- ure. Although his wife agrees to counseling, the man fears she will revert to her negative behaviors. Chapter 2: Family Violence Affects Others Outside of the Family 1. A Doctor Confronts Spousal Abuse in 41 an Elderly Couple Clif Cleaveland A physician recognizes signs that a patient is beating his wife. He offers to help but is rejected and told that the matter is a family affair. 2. A Victim of Domestic Violence Faces 47 Workplace Discrimination by Shonnetta Collins When a woman informs the bank where she works that her abusive ex-husband will soon be released from jail and may come calling, the bank management seems un- sympathetic to her situation. 3. A Classmate Fights to Free a Friend 51 Imprisoned for Domestic Murder Jennifer Gonnerman A man attends a high school reunion to find out a popu- lar classmate is serving a fifteen-year prison sentence for murdering her abusive husband. After hearing her story, he starts a campaign to free her and other abused vic- tims from long prison sentences. Chapter 3: Ending the Violence 1. A Police Detective Seeks Answers to Why 63 He Beat His Wife Duane Minard, as told to Tara McKelvey A police detective shares how his violent behavior com- pelled his wife to turn him in to authorities. After at- tending an intervention program, the man works on his anger and forms an organization to help others in need. 2. Taking a Stand against Abuse with the 69 Help of My Boss Lorel Stevens After an embarrassing altercation with her husband in the parking lot of her workplace, a woman in an abusive marriage discovers that her boss-who witnessed the abuse-is willing to get her the help she needs. 3. Breaking Free from My Abusive Children 72 Ana Sandor A therapist recounts the escalating physical and verbal abuse she received from her children. 4. A Mother Renounces a Pattern of Violence 77 Meri Nana-ama Danquah A woman tells how violence was the norm in her life both as a daughter growing up in Ghana and as a part- ner in an abusive relationship in the United States. She finally understands how violence has negatively impacted her life and vows to not pass the trauma on to her infant daughter. Organizations to Contact 85 For Further Research 89