Table of contents for 10 ways to save your marriage : case studies and advice from the nation's premier relationship experts / John M. Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, and Joan DeClaire.

Bibliographic record and links to related information available from the Library of Congress catalog.

Note: Contents data are machine generated based on pre-publication provided by the publisher. Contents may have variations from the printed book or be incomplete or contain other coding.


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CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
* From predicting divorce to preventing it: An introductory message from John and Julie Gottman
CHAPTER 1-"All you ever do is work!"
* Our analysis: A cycle of criticize/defend/counter-criticize
* Our advice
* One year later
* Healthy complaining vs. harmful complaining
* The "oversensitive" partner 
* When one partner works too much
* Quiz: Is there too much criticism in your relationship?
* Exercise: Listen for the longing behind your partner's complaints
* Exercise: What's your mission? What's your legacy?
CHAPTER 2-"Will we ever get over your affair?"
* Our analysis: Sidestepping difficult feelings blocks emotional intimacy
* Our advice
* One year later
* The hazards of avoiding conflict
* The affair-prone Marriage
* Quiz: Do you avoid conflicts or do you talk about them?
* Exercise: Calm down to avoid flooding 
* Exercise: Identifying your feelings 
* 
* Exercise: The marital poop detector
CHAPTER 3-"After all the crises in our lives, we don't feel close anymore"
* Our analysis: Stress creates emotional distance and hinders romance
* Our advice
* One year later
* How a little selfishness can help your marriage
* Quiz: How much stress have you had lately?
* Exercise: Steps to a healthier lifestyle
* Exercise: Keep your love map up-to-date
CHAPTER 4-"You never talk to me"
* Our analysis: Attacks and counter-attacks make the marriage unsafe for conversation
* Our advice
* One year later
* The antidotes to contempt: Fondness and admiration
* Quiz: Is there more room for fondness and admiration in your marriage? 
* Exercise: Three things I like about you
* Exercise: Nurturing fondness in your relationship: A seven-week plan
CHAPTER 5-"You don't care about my dreams"
* Our analysis: Ignoring dreams beneath the conflict stalls communication
* Our advice
* One year later 
* Your hidden dreams and aspirations: The "prairie dogs" of marital conflict
* Quiz: What are the dreams within your conflicts?
* Exercise: Responding to dreams within your conflict 
CHAPTER 6 -"You're so distant and irritable all the time"
* Our analysis: Avoiding emotional intensity postpones healing
* Our advice
* One year later
* Helping your partner through depression
* Quiz: Are you depressed?
* Quiz: Are you anxious?
* Exercise: Establish a ritual for stress-reducing conversation
CHAPTER 7-"I shouldn't have to nag!"
* Our analysis: Harsh words and defensiveness trump good intentions
* Our advice
* One year later
* Quiz: Harsh start-up: A problem in your marriage?
* Exercise: Turning harsh start-up to softened start-up 
* Quiz: Are you open to your partner's influence? 
* Exercise: Using the Aikido principle to accept influence
CHAPTER 8-"There's no passion, there's no fun"
* Our analysis: Failure to express anger leads to emotional distance
* Our advice
* One year later
* How anger can enhance a marriage
* A special message for husbands: "Embrace her anger" 
* Quiz: How do you feel about anger?
* Exercise: When you and partner have different ideas about anger
* Exercise: Responding to anger in a helpful way
CHAPTER 9-"We only have time for the kids now"
* Our analysis: Focus on the kids disguises the real trouble-failure at expressing needs
* Our advice
* Two months later
* What's wrong with a child-centered marriage? 
* Quiz: Is your marriage child-centered?
* Exercise: Give me a clue
* Exercise: Turning toward your partner's bids for connection
* Busting the myth of spontaneity in romance
* Exercise: A blueprint for conflict mediation
CHAPTER 10-"You're not satisfied unless there's some drama"
* Our analysis: Perpetual issues lead to conflict avoidance, lack of connection
* Our advice
* Two years later
* Don't get gridlocked over perpetual issues
* Quiz: What are your perpetual issues and what are your gridlocked problems?
* Exercise: Creating a culture of shared values and meaning
* Exercise: Thanksgiving checklist

Library of Congress Subject Headings for this publication:

Marriage.
Marital conflict.
Married people -- Psychology.